What’s up, you sexy innerwebs motherfuckers?
This might be old news for some of you out there, but I want to give a shout out to my new favorite artist, Jonathan Yeo, who first splashed onto the scene in August 2007 for releasing a collage portrait of then President George W. Bush made entirely of clippings from porn magazines. Right up my alley. He’s gone on to make similar portraits of Paris Hilton and Hugh Heffner. Without further ado, check out Yeo’s work….
Director Steven Soderbergh (Traffic, Ocean’s 11, 12, 13) has recently cast porn starlet Sasha Grey as the lead in his new project, “The Girlfriend Experience.” There is only one thing to say, “Nice…”
Take it from me, I’ve paid for the “girlfriend experience,” from a sex worker and it set me back a month’s pay and left my genitals a very peculiar color. Hopefully this will start a trend of hardcore, filth peddlers taking jobs from the type of hookers who keep their clothes on. (I’m looking right at you, Jessica Alba) And in case you were wondering, my favorite pornstar in a dramatic role is Kobe Tai in “Very Bad Things.” She plays a whore who gets killed by Jeremy Piven. Art imitating life, or art imitating last weekend?
Got bored tonight inbetween watching the new Sex and the City movie and my 11pm bedtime and decided to do my patriotic duty to keep our economy alive. I know that a lot of industries, the financial and auto industries to name two, are asking the US government for money to bail them out. To be honest I could give two shits about the financial services industry and the auto industry. First, I’m independently wealthy so I do all that finance shit through my family office. Second, I live in NYC and don’t need to drive a car (not that I would drive an American piece of shit anyway).
I am however, concerned about one industry in particular that the government won’t bail out, the adult entertainment industry. I spend approximately 25% of my waking hours (2 hours at home, 2 at the office) either watching porn or replaying porn in my mind’s eye. Therefore it is critical to my mental well-being that the skin industry not be the first to fail in this global recession.
Doing my part tonight I went down the usual avenues and doubled down on my subscriptions to the BangBros sites, the Naughty America sites, the Reality Kings sites as well as porn.com.
However, realizing that my economic stimulus package may not be enough to keep an industry alive I went a step further and invested in a device that no man should be made to live without. FyreTV costs $10 a month (which gets you between 50-100 movies a month depending on the studio) and plugs in between your internet router and your tv. You can stream 20,000 of your favorite fuck-and-suck films straight to your tv. An invention as great as the airplane? Not quite, but certainly better than some faggoty shit like the hybrid car (I hate hippies) or the labradoodle.